What to do with the keys ...

[spankme]

Anybody have suggestions about what to do with the keys if you use a cb-2000 or similar device for auto-tease?

In another discussion, it was suggested that you mail the keys to yourself and rely on the Post Office to decide when you get free. And i recommended using a small combination lock with a blind change of the settings. But there have to be lots of other methods being used ...

... there have to be some other alternatives when you don't have a key holder. Or maybe there are some key holders who have ways they hide or withhold the keys for a great tease.

spankme :twisted:

[wt1262001]

Well, you can freeze the key in the ice? Put it in a safe which can only be opened by you and someone else, as you only know half of the combination? Put the key in the safe deposit box of a bank?

But key play can be dangerous, so one of the members told me that he gave one of the spare keys to a Pro Domme. In cases of real emergencies, he would ask Her for help. :)

~wonders how do i know these stuff~ oh wellz ... :twisted:

[whirlingskirt]

What an interesting dilemma. I suggest that you dont make the choice when to retreive the key.

Paint one side of the key (heads i win)
Insert the key into a huge high-quality white/translucent balloon,
fill it full of hot air (shouldnt be hard for you, dear),
tie it tightly
and place the balloon where you will see it often, as a reminder. (AWAY from heat or sun)
You may shake the balloon gently once a day. If the key lands with the painted side UP, you get to stroke your cock that day for 10 minutes. If not, your out of luck til the next day. When the balloon has (finallllly) deflated 100%without popping, the key is yours ....(when the ballon disinegrates in 40, 000 years) :wink:

[spankme]

You guys can be really cruel when you want to be (lol ... I think).

Yes, wt , you heard it here first. i admit that the ice trick is mine, but it's just a minor deterrant. It forces me to think first before using it. But it only takes a little hot water to get at the key. i would like to find something a little more frustrating. And, yes my Domme friend does have the extra key, so if something did happen to my key, i could still get out ... but i suspect that asking would cost me.

As for using hot air, maybe SOMEONE would like to help me blow up that balloon. [Is it hot air to be complicated or have a complex life?] If that remark was directed to being long-winded, mea culpa. If it was to suggest that my posts are bs ... then it's way off base.

The question in this topic is asked in earnest ... i have some ways to make the key an obstacle when using the cb-2000 for self denial, and i have a fair amount of opportunity due to my wife's work and travel schedule. i would really like to know if others have found creative things to do with the key to more effectively enforce chastity, but still be able to retrieve it or get out when necessary.

spankme :roll:

[subs]

Hi Spankme How about a timed safe. If your handy there's instructions on how to build 1 for about $55.00. altairboy.com search "timer controlled key safe" some other ideas there as well.

[spankme]

i very much appreciate the thoughtful suggestion. i read the article, and the related articles, and several stories that went with it. Food for thought.

This is pretty close to what i'm looking for. My wife is leaving town for a week, beginning on Saturday, so i would like to have a way to enforce the chastity while she is gone. i think it would be grand to be so horny when she gets home.

Thanks again,

spankme :D

[whirlingskirt]

If that remark was directed to being long-winded, mea culpa. If it was to suggest that my posts are bs ... then it's way off base.


Neither!
To borrow a line from an appropriate song:
"i been a bad bad girl. Ive been careless with a delicate man."
~Fiona Apple


Did not realize you were the sweet sensitive :P type and would view that comment as anything other than which it was intended: A friendly joke.
I'm Very Sorry if it offended you.
WS

[MugzyBrown]

oooh a Fiona quote. very nice.

[sirlockedalot]

I saw this recently...

Take out a safe deposit box at a bank that takes your whole linchbreak to get to (i.e. in the next town). Then you can only get to it during business hours, leaving you helpless during those long lonely nights :)

If you try hard, you can usually resist a couple of more days this way. Try leaving the box key at home, in the freezer.

Important note: NEVER trust important keys to the postal service!

[spankme]

i guess i am prone to being a bit sensitive. :cry:

As i said, i really was looking for suggestions, and your advice came across (to me) as a put down. And that seemed especially painful, since i really liked, and appreciated, some of your other advice (i.e., the Vanilla Wives discussion).

This incidence raises an interesting conundrum (perhaps the subject of your next toss-up question). On the one hand, i'm here for the teasing and denial activity ... i "enjoy" the teases, the frustration, and the humiliation (some of it self-inflicted). On the other hand, i'm also here for the intellectual side ... the intelligent discussion of issues and relationships, the advice, and the lively debate. How do you know (how do others know) which hat is being worn at any particular moment?

spankme

[whirlingskirt]

Hi Spankme--

Sometimes we all need to have a thick-skin if we are to partake in interactive online activities. Im glad you were able to forgive me :roll:
hehehe

Your question at the bottom of your post was a good one:

"How do you know (how do others know) which hat is being worn at any particular moment? "

In Yahoo messenger i am able to change the color of my text to signify my intent. Generally, i am a sweet, mild-mannered chatmate and most on my buddy list *dont* know of my 'secrets'. I was vanilla a long long long time before i ever turned kinky.
The few that do know me sensually know me well, can identify my 'hat' because i change from being sweet and kind (read: wholesome) to being commanding and aggressive. (from standard color/purple to red) This is a switch from friendship to role-playing games, perhaps?

Here, tho, i am unable to get my colors to work. Everything is basic black. It is much more difficult because, without the facial nuances and body language, and without hearing the speech syntax, it is impossible to tell if i am joking, or playing---or serious.

I am as loyal as the day is long, and would NEVER do something to intentionally hurt someones feelings. I would defend anyone here whom i like and respect. You have my word on that.

I, too, am here for the discussion and intelligent conversation. I am not seeking 'slaves'. and i would much rather be friends with the guys here than a mistress. (but it is SOOO fun to play with you in the chat room after ive gotten to know you).

Thanks for your interesting question. I hope others here have suggestions or comments to assist us in understanding the intent of others posts.

[spankme]

Dear, Dear Whirlingskirt,

Once again it is i who should be apologizing to you; i presumed badly. i agree completely with you regarding the difficulties of chat and e-mail. It so easy to be misunderstood when you don't have the emotional affects, the facial expressions and gestures, to carry the nuance.

i really like your color suggestion. i'll have to experiment and see what i can come up with. Basic black works for the serious stuff. Maybe RED would be the choice for all those wonderful D/s and T&D moments, and for just plain horsing around.

spankme (with a small "s", at your service) :D

ps. i thought your bad, bad girl comment was cute. Are you sure i can't interest you in a nice chastity belt? i'll hold your keys, you hold mine? (smurks and snickers) -- S/spankme :twisted:

[spankme]

Dear Whirlingskirt,

we're in color! i've got both the forum and the chat room figured out!

Tip #1 (forum) - Just click on the pulled down menu above, select a color and enter. Then put your cursor between the two bracketed areas and type. To change color, click out side the second set of brackets with the slash-color message, and choose a new color.

Tip #2 (chat room) - First click on the color you want in the spectrum bar at the bottom. The box at the right of the bar will change color. Then click on the box. This sends a message announcing you have changed color. Thereafter, whatever you type will be in that color until you change it again.

Woo hoo! we're havin' some fun now!

spankme :lol:

[/b]

[whirlingskirt]

Ohhhhh I get it! :twisted:

I never knew why it didnt type in the selected color and now i see that it may be because i wasnt typing inside the brackets!


this is only a test of course, but i think pink is pretty

Thanks for checking it, Spankme out and um...instructing me :wink:

Fiona Apple
Tidal (1996)
Criminal

I've been a bad bad girl
I've been careless with my delicate man
And its a sad sad world
When a girl will break a boy
Just because she can
Don't you tell me to deny it
I've done wrong and I want to
Suffer for my sins
I've come to you 'cause I need
Guidance to be true
And I just don't know where I can begin

What I need is a good defense
'Cause I'm feelin' like a criminal
And I need to redeemed
To the one I've sinned against
Because he's all I ever knew of love

Heaven help me for the way I am
Save me from these evil deeds
Before I get them done
I know tomorrow brings the consequence
At hand
But I keep livin' this day like
The next will never come

Oh help me but don't tell me
To deny it
I've got to cleanse myself
Of all these lies till I'm good
Enough for him
I've got a lot to lose and I'm
Bettin' high
So I'm beggin' you before it ends
Just tell me where to begin

What I need is a good defense
'Cause I'm feelin' like a criminal
And I need to redeemed
To the one I've sinned against
Because he's all I ever knew of love

Let me know the way
Before there's hell to pay
Give me room to lay the law and let me go
I've got to make a play
To make my lover stay
So what would an angel say
The devil wants to know

What I need is a good defense
'Cause I'm feelin' like a criminal
And I need to redeemed
To the one I've sinned against
Because he's all I ever knew of love

What I need is a good defense
'Cause I'm feelin' like a criminal
And I need to redeemed
To the one I've sinned against

Because he's all I ever knew of love

[snook]

All you have to do is melt some wax over the safe key. Then have your wife make her mark on the wax. You can melt the wax if you need to get out; but she will know. Hope this will help

[spankme]

i like your idea, snook. If i had a keyholder, that would be a great way to keep the key present but unattainable. Another in the list of teases that can be used with us cb'ers.

Unfortunately, i am not so blessed (read Vanilla Wives). So, i only get to indulge my "hobby" when she is away at work, or on the road traveling. i need (okay, Whirly, you've become my conscience around here, ... i want) to find ways of being denied the key while i'm on my own, but still be able to take it off before she comes home.

Oh, and i do fantasize about getting it on and not being able to get it off so that she comes home and catches me wearing it. It's a great fantasy, but probably not great real life (re-read Vanilla Wives).

But for those with a keyholder, i think you have suggested a nice touch.

spankme :D

ps. Is it just me, or does anyone else get the slightest little thrill whenever they write a post and hit the "Submit" button?

[Gloria]

This is a great thread!!

As a few of you know I am fantasizing about remote-chastity. Of course the issue there is how to keep a guy honest but yet safe. So for me it is not so much who holds the key as much as it is whether or not he cheats and removes the device (after all there is ALWAYS the possibility of duplicate keys even if he were to mail them to me)

Had an idea about a "virtual chastity belt"

Just wondering if anyone wants to do a little R&D along with me?

Gloria

[snook]

Dear Spanker; I suggest that you come 'cum' clean with your vanilla wife and tell her that you want her to control you. I did it and it has worked!!!
(maybe too well). Tell her how much you love her and how happy it would make you if she took control. Tell her you just want to try it for awhile and if she still isn't interested that you will never bring it up again. You might be surprised!! Good luck.

[spankme]

snooks,

Thanks for the good thoughts. Just wish it was that easy. Interestingly, i asked my Pro Domme buddy what to do many months ago. She gave exactly the opposite advice. She said that unless a woman is emotionally ready to play, there is a VERY real risk of upsetting the relationship. If she is actively vanilla and has expressed that point-of-view, then i think it is prudent to keep one's amusements to one's self until, and if, the proper groundwork is laid. Whirly and others have made some good suggestions on how to go slowly (see Vanilla Wife) ... and how to make sure these interests/desires are brought up in a way that is carefully and lovingly communicated.

"Somebody" (bad, bad girl) suggested that i can be full of hot air (lol). On this issue, however, i am very sincere. i like T&D and i'm ready to play, but i love my wife more, a LOT more. i'll indulge my obsession on the internet and on my own time, and i'll assuasge my guilt knowing that she gets a benefit if my play leaves me a most wanting and attentive lover.

Again, thanks for thinking good thoughts. i like the fact that our strange little community is such a RAINBOW of ideas and experiences and situations and opportunities.

spank :D

[spankme]

Dear Gloria,

Okay, the serious stuff has been addressed (see above)!

i am on my own from Saturday night until Thursday morning. And, i'm curious. What kind of R&D did you have in mind?

spank 8O

[whirlingskirt]

Hi Spank!

No WONDER you get along so well with your wife! You only see her 2 days a week! lol

Far be it from ME (innocent look) to be the voice of your conscience. My motto: live and let live. As long as you are healthy, happy and still learning about your sexuality, you are A-ok/smart as a whip :!: in my book---whether or NOT you share your kink with your wife.

I would tend to disagree with the advice given to you by your professional dom friend. I believe that she has ulterior motives (wanting you to return to .her for your 'fix'). I also think that unless you are completely aware of the dynamics of a relationship, any advice offered is based on your own values, not with the other persons best interests at heart. i *DO* agree with you, however that your kinky desires are best left until YOU are ready to take the risk in asking/approaching the subject with her.

On the other hand, Gloria is offering you an opportunity on a silver platter. Is it marital cheating if SHE commands your sexuality?
I dunno :?

[spankme]

Thanks, Whirly! That was a wonderful response.

i would like to respond to two points. First, i agree wholeheartly with you on your comment that advice comes from your own values. So much of the advice that is given here comes from the giver's experiences. That's not a criticism ... we should all continue to offer our views and ideas and great suggestions. But each of us needs to weigh that advice with the knowledge of our own circumstances. It is worth noting that my Domme friend basically turned me down as a potential client ... i think she made a pretty careful assessment of my situation and offered some good advice. And for that i value her friendship. She understood that i have some unfullfilled needs (wants); but she also helped me to see that it was better to leave those in the fantasy world than to risk upsetting a good, sound, and loving real-life relationship.

Which gets me to the Gloria question: ... is it marital cheating if SHE commands [my] sexuality? That's a tough one (i like your answer). Yes ... to the extent that visiting this site and taking advantage of all the teasing opportunities is marital cheating. i think Gloria is offering a heightened form of the activity many of us are already participating in. But, no ... to the extent that it does not detract from the marital relationship. Teasing and denial is such a funny (odd, not haha) kink. The more T&D you have the more you want to have sex. In my case (and this is important, because we have so many different circumstances represented here), the denial leaves me with a phenomenal desire to please me wife.

Maybe all this play is Viagra for the mind (lol).

If i thought that i was taking away from my wife, i would stop in an instant. If she somehow found out (and putting the attending problems that would create aside) and wanted me to stop, i would. But, when i make love to my wife, all of this goes away, except to the extent that it has helped me focus on her in that moment in that place. The supreme benefit (for me) has been to focus myself on giving her pleasure and deriving my pleasure secondarily from the pleasure i give.

So, is it cheating? To quote someone wise i know, "I dunno".

spank :wink:

[keane]

I have a little information about mailing keys. I paid for a keyholder service. I mailed the keys to a Lady for a specified amount of time. She mailed the keys back, but all I got was an empty envelope. The envelope had been opened and the keys are gone.

I would suggest that anyone who mails keys for any reason put them in a bubble envelope or small box. That way no one can tell that there is a hard, metal object in the package.

[Vidark]

That way no one can tell that there is a hard, metal object in the package.

I guess there is now a hard package inside a metal (or plastic) object...

You realize you left out the most important info: what did you do?.

Eager to hear,

v

[Luvsub]

Keane's idea about not mailing keys in a regular envelope is a good one. I'm a "postie" :evil: and I've seen hundreds {literal} of envelopes torn open and destroyed by our sorting machines. (that's why the warnings not to send money through the mail, people send change or keys and it doesn't go through the equipment, but the envelope around it does). Use a paded envelope or a "photo mailer". They get processed by different, and more forgiving, equipment.

Luvsub

[keane]

Removal of any chastity device other than a belt or the new style Lori's tube is fairly simple. The catch is you can't get back in. With a steel belt or Lori's tube it is still possible to get out but requires destruction of the device. The only thing that keeps anyone in a CB is the fear of losing the relationship.

[spankme]

Hey, Keane! Thanks for opening up this old thread. Just got back from vacation (missed you all!) and this is the first thing i read (there was supposed to be a story update from Peter that i was look for but didn't find, but i'm sure we'll find out what's up with him soon enough ...).

i had forgotten how interesting this discussion had been. i took the first advice i got on the question and decided NOT to trust the mail. Obviously, a wise choice on my part ... "others" appear not to have been too lucky with that approach. It's been over six months and i am still only marginally closer to introducing Vanilla and the cage to each other (we have made some small progress on teasing, but these things need to proceed slowly ... but perhaps there is some critical mass building). In the mean time, the question of restricting key access during self-teasing remains. i would still love to hear about your experiences and collect your suggestions.

Rested and generally relaxed, but sporting a set of racy blue balls ( :oops: ),

-- spank

[billsparks]

Why not put the key up for auction on the OD auction site? :twisted: :idea:

That'll force you to come clean to your wife and put you in a very interesting predicament. :oops:

If you feel bad about taking money from a Mistress, do what FIH did and donate the cash to OD and then you can tell your ife it's something you did for charity! :lol:

[snook]

Going; Going; Gone!!! Auction the keys!!! Trouble is; you wouldn't know who wins. Are you going to trust the unknown? That would put a huge spin on chastity roulette. Auction the keys off and keep us posted on what transpires. Should be cheap entertainment for the runners up!