Wycked_Syren
05-07-2008, 03:54 PM
Last week I touched on EH and how it can be an incredibly bonding experience. Today I talk about a pretty intense form of EH: Public Humiliation (or PH).
Just like everything in BDSM, Public Humiliation can vary widely from couple to couple. It can be done in varying degrees also – from the purist standpoint: PH would imply its humiliation done in a public place in front of strangers. Then there’s PH in front of like minded folks, much like poor dino over there in my humiliation stocks here in Boudd’s lovely park. There’s PH that is carried out virtually – like on websites, blogs, forums, etc. And then there’s the teasing/threat of any or all of the aforementioned methods amongst yourselves while out in public – so no one is REALLY privy to what’s happening – BUT could be made so at any given time.
The purist’s take on public humiliation can be quite daunting for (believe it or not) both parties. The sub because he/she is concerned about how they will be perceived by the crowd, whether or not they’ll be able to carry out their Domme’s orders, and whether or not doing so will come with any “backlash”. Concern over backlash could range from whether anyone will say anything about the activities, to whether or not someone they know from a non-kink setting (school, work, church, etc) will see them, to whether or not the authorities will step in with potential legal ramifications. I think the responsible Domme will likely also be concerned with potential backlash, and will often spend much time choosing how, when, where, and to what extent she’ll publicly humiliate her sub.
There’s no greater kick for the Humiliatrix than to watch her sub squirm and blush while carrying out the humiliating task she ordered, BUT sometimes being there is unfortunately impossible. And with so many of our relationships existing strictly online, there’s need to be wildly creative if you two want to explore PH from the purist standpoint, and I’m gonna offer some of the tricks I’ve employed to get you started. (In hopes that you’ll come up with some of your own killer ideas and share them with me *grins*) Some of the PURE public humiliation scenes I’ve engaged in range from shopping trips for humiliating items (I’ve participated both in person and via the phone), making them dress ridiculously and venture out in public (via phone), answer the door (for a delivery person) in varying stages of undress OR dress up (participation via phone), and I’ve ordered one meal for the both of us – eaten what I wanted and slid the plate across the table back to him for him to consume my leftovers which may or may not include food that was chewed and spit out by myself (participation – obviously in person). For many, just being made to wear a collar (or symbol of a collar) out in public or having to adhere to proper protocol in public 'nilla settings is pretty dang humiliating – but incredibly exciting… I recall feeling a rush watching my boy try and explain his locked cuffs to a cashier at a gas station. I dream of someday sending an especially adventurous humiliation hound to represent me and the Femdom lifestyle as a whole, at the American Idol tryouts – I mean wouldn’t that ROCK?!
Here in SL probably the most common type of PH is the second type I mentioned – humiliation in front of like-minded people in an area dedicated to similar activities – like the sim Boudd is part of. And we’ve all seen it. So much so that as was touched on last week by baska, EH and even PH seems almost commonplace and doesn’t really impress many here anymore. That’s where creativity and knowing your sub come in handy. As the Domme, you’re expected to constantly be scheming up new ways to subjugate and humiliate your subs – and do it with flair. Here and RL gathering with like-minded people, you’re way more likely to run into people who want to participate in your scene. Could be as small a role as giggling and pointing to as big a role as joining in on hurling insults at your sub or barking commands. Whether or not the two of you are open to others participating in your scene is something that should be discussed at great length before engaging in and PH especially that carried out amongst “friends”. Now despite your feelings about audience participation it’s not feasible to expect people to not laugh and point if you or your sub is acting the fool, but if it was agreed that others would not be participating in your scene with a “co-Top” role, it’s the Domme’s responsibility to remove the outsiders from the scene or your scene from the public.
As touched on all of us as SL denizens have seen avatars dressed or posed in some humiliating fashion, so much so that maybe this doesn’t hold enough thrill for you or your sub anymore – you need something bigger. I’ve personally found with PH in a PH friendly zone – it’s much more powerful when its simple little things. Very PERSONAL simple little things. Things like making your sub tell the people in the lounge how you denied them for 3 weeks and then made you ruin their orgasm, or making them wear a tag over their head telling everyone they encounter that they’re a “dirty lil wanker”, or something like having to do a strip tease for your friends are innovative ways to engage in PH for the jaded crowd. Or as offered last week by shy, make them sing on voice for the whole house – heck I think making them do just about anything on voice could be mildly humiliating for most. Ohhhh, could you imagine FINALLY granting them permission to cum, but only if they do it on voice in the lounge?? – kinda embarrassing I’d imagine. *wicked grins*
Then there’s the static form of virtual PH that I mentioned. There have been times where I’ve required my sub to go to public forum and post his recount of a humiliating scene we’d engaged in. Other times I’ve taken them into a chat room and done some verbal (textual) humiliation… made them beg for or emote some humiliating task. Then there were a couple boys I required keep a whole blog to tell the world just how little control they had over themselves and how much they adored me for humiliating and dominating them. Only problem I’ve seen with this form of humiliation is that it’s ALWAYS gonna be out there for people to read – even after the relationship has dissolved into the past. Then again, that’s probably part of the allure to such activities.
And since we all know the power of the looming threat of exposure I’m not going to spend our precious time going into that right now. *giggles*
Public humiliation is a powerful experience for both Domme and sub. The Domme gets to flex her control muscle for the “whole world” to see and revel in the fact that her obedient and dedicated sub cannot or will not refuse her and her command. Pretty heady stuff huh? To have someone so wrapped around your little finger that they’d happily humiliate themselves for you. And for the sub it’s a source of pride… they get to show the “whole world” just how much control you have over them – how dominant their Domme is. Not to mention the pride they must experience by being so dedicated and obedient that they’d lower themselves to such depths to please, amuse, and serve Her. Wow, to me – that’s sooooo romantic and sexy… but then I’m a twisted Bitch. So don’t take my word for it – go out there and do some experimenting – but please let me know how it goes.
Just like everything in BDSM, Public Humiliation can vary widely from couple to couple. It can be done in varying degrees also – from the purist standpoint: PH would imply its humiliation done in a public place in front of strangers. Then there’s PH in front of like minded folks, much like poor dino over there in my humiliation stocks here in Boudd’s lovely park. There’s PH that is carried out virtually – like on websites, blogs, forums, etc. And then there’s the teasing/threat of any or all of the aforementioned methods amongst yourselves while out in public – so no one is REALLY privy to what’s happening – BUT could be made so at any given time.
The purist’s take on public humiliation can be quite daunting for (believe it or not) both parties. The sub because he/she is concerned about how they will be perceived by the crowd, whether or not they’ll be able to carry out their Domme’s orders, and whether or not doing so will come with any “backlash”. Concern over backlash could range from whether anyone will say anything about the activities, to whether or not someone they know from a non-kink setting (school, work, church, etc) will see them, to whether or not the authorities will step in with potential legal ramifications. I think the responsible Domme will likely also be concerned with potential backlash, and will often spend much time choosing how, when, where, and to what extent she’ll publicly humiliate her sub.
There’s no greater kick for the Humiliatrix than to watch her sub squirm and blush while carrying out the humiliating task she ordered, BUT sometimes being there is unfortunately impossible. And with so many of our relationships existing strictly online, there’s need to be wildly creative if you two want to explore PH from the purist standpoint, and I’m gonna offer some of the tricks I’ve employed to get you started. (In hopes that you’ll come up with some of your own killer ideas and share them with me *grins*) Some of the PURE public humiliation scenes I’ve engaged in range from shopping trips for humiliating items (I’ve participated both in person and via the phone), making them dress ridiculously and venture out in public (via phone), answer the door (for a delivery person) in varying stages of undress OR dress up (participation via phone), and I’ve ordered one meal for the both of us – eaten what I wanted and slid the plate across the table back to him for him to consume my leftovers which may or may not include food that was chewed and spit out by myself (participation – obviously in person). For many, just being made to wear a collar (or symbol of a collar) out in public or having to adhere to proper protocol in public 'nilla settings is pretty dang humiliating – but incredibly exciting… I recall feeling a rush watching my boy try and explain his locked cuffs to a cashier at a gas station. I dream of someday sending an especially adventurous humiliation hound to represent me and the Femdom lifestyle as a whole, at the American Idol tryouts – I mean wouldn’t that ROCK?!
Here in SL probably the most common type of PH is the second type I mentioned – humiliation in front of like-minded people in an area dedicated to similar activities – like the sim Boudd is part of. And we’ve all seen it. So much so that as was touched on last week by baska, EH and even PH seems almost commonplace and doesn’t really impress many here anymore. That’s where creativity and knowing your sub come in handy. As the Domme, you’re expected to constantly be scheming up new ways to subjugate and humiliate your subs – and do it with flair. Here and RL gathering with like-minded people, you’re way more likely to run into people who want to participate in your scene. Could be as small a role as giggling and pointing to as big a role as joining in on hurling insults at your sub or barking commands. Whether or not the two of you are open to others participating in your scene is something that should be discussed at great length before engaging in and PH especially that carried out amongst “friends”. Now despite your feelings about audience participation it’s not feasible to expect people to not laugh and point if you or your sub is acting the fool, but if it was agreed that others would not be participating in your scene with a “co-Top” role, it’s the Domme’s responsibility to remove the outsiders from the scene or your scene from the public.
As touched on all of us as SL denizens have seen avatars dressed or posed in some humiliating fashion, so much so that maybe this doesn’t hold enough thrill for you or your sub anymore – you need something bigger. I’ve personally found with PH in a PH friendly zone – it’s much more powerful when its simple little things. Very PERSONAL simple little things. Things like making your sub tell the people in the lounge how you denied them for 3 weeks and then made you ruin their orgasm, or making them wear a tag over their head telling everyone they encounter that they’re a “dirty lil wanker”, or something like having to do a strip tease for your friends are innovative ways to engage in PH for the jaded crowd. Or as offered last week by shy, make them sing on voice for the whole house – heck I think making them do just about anything on voice could be mildly humiliating for most. Ohhhh, could you imagine FINALLY granting them permission to cum, but only if they do it on voice in the lounge?? – kinda embarrassing I’d imagine. *wicked grins*
Then there’s the static form of virtual PH that I mentioned. There have been times where I’ve required my sub to go to public forum and post his recount of a humiliating scene we’d engaged in. Other times I’ve taken them into a chat room and done some verbal (textual) humiliation… made them beg for or emote some humiliating task. Then there were a couple boys I required keep a whole blog to tell the world just how little control they had over themselves and how much they adored me for humiliating and dominating them. Only problem I’ve seen with this form of humiliation is that it’s ALWAYS gonna be out there for people to read – even after the relationship has dissolved into the past. Then again, that’s probably part of the allure to such activities.
And since we all know the power of the looming threat of exposure I’m not going to spend our precious time going into that right now. *giggles*
Public humiliation is a powerful experience for both Domme and sub. The Domme gets to flex her control muscle for the “whole world” to see and revel in the fact that her obedient and dedicated sub cannot or will not refuse her and her command. Pretty heady stuff huh? To have someone so wrapped around your little finger that they’d happily humiliate themselves for you. And for the sub it’s a source of pride… they get to show the “whole world” just how much control you have over them – how dominant their Domme is. Not to mention the pride they must experience by being so dedicated and obedient that they’d lower themselves to such depths to please, amuse, and serve Her. Wow, to me – that’s sooooo romantic and sexy… but then I’m a twisted Bitch. So don’t take my word for it – go out there and do some experimenting – but please let me know how it goes.